Oko Lele

Lately, Troy has been obsessed with this Japanese cartoon called “Oko Lele.” It’s about a Japanese boy that transports to the Stone Age through a portal, where he meets two cavemen, Oko and Lele. Along the way they pick up four other characters, and the group tries to survive the dangers of the world together.

Despite the fact that it’s in another language, the show does a good job of describing what the characters are thinking through thought bubbles that appear above their heads. The characters encounter all kinds of other creatures like zombies, vampires, cannibals, and dinosaurs on their adventures. Don Juan and Davey Jones from Pirates of the Caribbean even make cameos! In one episode they have a Jonah in the whale moment, and in another they find Pandora’s Box. They make allusions to Jumanji, Spider-Man, King Kong, and extra terrestrials, so they cover the gamut.

The characters usually end up in some pickle and have to either think or luck their way out of it. Injuries and almost certain death await them around every turn, but they always pull through. Troy thinks it’s hilarious. And I have to admit that the show is growing on me too.

The Invisible Giant

When we went to pick up Troy today, we ran into our German friends picking up their son. My wife has been dealing with some bad stuff at work lately, so they wanted to inquire as to the latest update. While she harangued them with the details, I played with Troy.

I was chasing him around when he suddenly stopped and stared at the building across the drive. It’s the main building for Texas Women’s University. I asked him what he was looking at, and he said, “That building is moving, dada.”

In reality, the clouds were drifting quickly by behind it, giving the illusion of motion. But instead wanting to foster his curiosity and imagination, I replied, “I do believe it is. Do you think there’s a giant over there pushing it back and forth?”

He got really excited. “Yeah! It’s a big giant! Let’s go see him.” And he took off around the side of the building. I gave chase, but when we got to the back of the building, there was no giant. He paused a moment to look at the building again. It was still “moving.” “He must have gone to the other side. He knows we’re after him, and he’s scared! Let’s get him!” Troy exclaimed, and he gave chase again.

I followed behind him, wondering what a giant would have to be scared of from us, and wondering what we’d do if we actually caught him. But Troy didn’t seem to be thinking that far in advance, he was rushing headlong into “danger.” That giant was going down! Unfortunately…or fortunately, depending on your perspective…we did not find the giant on the other side. He had eluded us again. We searched every bush, dumpster, and tree we could find; but he had magically disappeared.

After that, Troy wanted me to take him to the top of the parking garage at the end of the parking lot. Worried about the danger of getting smushed by a car, I put him on my shoulders and walked the ramps up four levels to the top. After admiring the view of the city, and watching the white egrets fly by, we headed back down.

Mama's Little Turd

The last few days, Troy has only wanted his mother…for everything. I’m not allowed to do anything with or for him. It’s not just that he pushes me away, but he’s been mean about it. He’s disrespectful and cruel in his rejection.

For example, tonight I was trying to give him a bath, and he sat down in the tub with his back to me and refused to get up or turn around. We usually give him a quick standing bath, so it’s very difficult to bath him when he sitting…esp. when he’s as far away as possible and inaccessible. When I asked him to get up, he started screaming, “I don’t want you, I want mama!”

After the bath, which was rough and difficult, I was trying to dry him off, and he kept kicking me in the chest repeatedly. I told him not to do that, and he took a swipe at my face with his fist. So, I wrapped the towel tightly around him, pinning his arms to his side. He screamed all the way to the changing table, and when I put him on his back and released the towel, he kicked me in the face.

He wouldn’t let me put his diaper or clothes on. He kept rolling over, flipping his legs in the air, and moving away from me. Anything to make it difficult. And all the while, he was saying, “I want mama! Where’s mama?”

Later on at dinner, after he was taking a particularly long time in between bites, I said, “It’s getting late, bud, you need to take a bite and finish up.” To which he replied, “Don’t talk to me!” and went back to his TV. And I’d finally had enough. I was so completely hurt and disrespected. It was so casually cruel.

My wife tried to tell me that he didn’t know what he was saying, but I think he did. He was trying to hurt me, to get under my skin and push my buttons. He does it all the time. I’m the mean one, and his mother is the nice one. But it’s easy to be the nice one, when you’re not the disciplinarian or the taskmaster. When you aren’t the one trying to keep our son on a schedule and teach him boundaries. When you just swoop in every once in a while with a hug or indulgence. He despises me for doing the right thing…for doing what’s best for him. And I’m left on an island by myself for my love.

The sad part is that I actually left work a little early today and went to the store to buy him a gift. I walked up and down every aisle to find just the perfect thing to make him happy. But I’m not giving it to him now. He doesn’t deserve a gift or reward for his behavior. I’m even tempted to return it. But I will sleep on it first. I won’t act rashly in my disappointment and anger.

My wife put Troy to bed tonight. I didn’t even hug him or tell him goodnight. It’s the first time in his entire life that I didn’t tell him goodnight. I want to…desperately, but I’m afraid that he’ll just push me away again, and I’ve had enough hurt and rejection for one night. Besides, he doesn’t seem to care. He’s not asking for me. He doesn’t notice my presence missing from his life. He has his mother. That’s all he really wanted anyway…as he constantly reminds me.

Distraction

We are still struggling with getting Troy to eat. It’s not that he won’t eat at all, he just had to do it on his own terms. He’s also very random about the food. Sometimes he’ll gobble it down, and other times he picks sparingly. Unfortunately, he judges food by the look rather than the taste. He’ll tell us that something is “yucky!” before he’s even tried it. And there’s no reasoning with him once he’s made his mind up about it.

And there is no rhyme or reason to it. He won’t eat sweet potatoes in any form, for example. But he loves carrots. So it can’t be the color. Eggs and chicken are hit or miss, depending on his mood. Beef is out entirely. Lettuce and cucumbers are always a winner.

Being distracted by the TV is still a must. He won’t even touch his food until we’ve put something on. We’ve tried talking to him or reading him a story, and all he says the entire time…on repeat…is, “I wanna watch the dinosaurs on the TV, mama.” So, we acquiesce, because it’s a small price to pay to get some food inside him.

What I found to be more successful than sitting there the entire two hours saying, “Take a bite, Troy,” is to engage him about what’s happening in the show. I’ll pause the TV and ask him a question about the show. Pausing it gets his attention for a few seconds. Asking him a question about the show makes him interested instead of annoyed. All on his own, he’ll reach down and take a bite without me having to bring it up. He tends to eat more, and both of us tend to be in a better mood afterward. It still doesn’t speed the process up, but it’s progress.

Easter Evening

This evening, we all went to the lake to enjoy some water time and refreshing weather.  The park was packed with other families that had the same idea, but we managed to find a little piece of beach where we could get our feet wet.  While my wife stood in the water, enjoying the feel of the waves lapping against her shins, Troy decided to wage war on the incoming waves.  He found a piece of driftwood and proceeded to bash the waves repeatedly as they rolled into the shore.  The waves would not be deterred, but Troy managed to drench himself (and us) with water as droplets were hurled sideways and upwards with ferocity.  

Not content to allow us to shelter a safe distance from his onslaught, he goaded both of us to join him in the water...only to proceed to splash us with lake water.  When the driftwood seemed to be less effective, Troy switched to picking up large rocks from the shoreline and hurling them into the water, like Polyphemus at Odysseus.

We stayed long enough to watch the sunset and then headed to the car to change Troy into the spare clothes that we've started to carry with us now.  It wasn't a typical Easter, but when have we ever done anything typical?!

Easter Walk

I took Troy out for an early morning Easter walk today. Along the way, we saw a June Bug laying on his back on the sidewalk, kicking his feet, and struggling to turn over. So, I stopped and helped put him into the grass. Troy exclaimed, “There’s more over there! Help them too, dada!” So, I helped a few more struggling bugs get their footing again. Pointing at even more bugs, Troy said, “There’s more there, dada. They need our help!”

“They’re dead, bud.”

“Well, help them.”

“I can’t help them all unfortunately. But we saved a few, and even though that seems like a small difference, it was a big deal to those few bugs.”

“I wish we could help them all, dada.”

“Me too, bud. Me too.”

Pretty soon, I distracted him with other bugs and insects crawling across the sidewalk. He particularly liked the Roly Poly Pill Bugs, and he kept saying, “Turn them into a ball, dada.” So, I did.

He also got excited to find dead, dried worms along the way for some reason. He even made me go out of the way to find more. Eventually, he got out to walk, because he felt like I wasn’t doing a good enough job at finding them.

I taught him about different kinds of birds. Like the mockingbird, and how they change their tune so much, because they’re singing other birds’ songs. They don’t have a song of their own. Kind of like Pentatonix. They’re the mockingbird of the human world.

We heard a morning dove “hooing” from a rooftop. I tried to imitate her, but I ended up sounding like a mad scientist laughing. “Hoo, hoo, ho, hoo!”

And all along the path, we kept our eyes open for the elusive Easter Bunny, which we never saw. But we kept hoping, because wouldn’t it be cool to see a bunny rabbit on Easter!

Slooooowww Moooootion

After dinner tonight, I was trying to get Troy moving toward getting ready for bed. He, as usual, was making every excuse to stay up. Suddenly, he was hungry, and he needed just one more bite of food. Then, he was thirsty. Then, he wanted to fight me. Then, he wanted to watch his TV show.

Always looking for ways to entertain him and make him WANT to do what I ask of him, I said, “It’s tiiiiiimmmmee to goooo to beeeeddd” in an exaggerated deep, slow-motion voice.

Troy, who is both witty and a smart aleck, in other words my son, said back to me in the same deep, slow-motion voice, “Nooooo, it’s tiiiiiiimmmmeeee to waaaaatch my shooooooowww!”

Adventure by the Lake

I took Troy to Lake Carolyn, today near the Mandalay Canals in Las Colinas. I thought he’d enjoy going somewhere new and enjoy getting out to stretch his legs. The lake is built in between several apartment complexes and has a Venetian canal feel to it with brick walkways and bridges that span several places. There are large cypress trees providing shade and atmosphere along the water and their soft branches hang down and brush the myriad of walkers as they walk by. Ducks float along the shoreline, and Troy kept throwing sticks at them for some reason. Luckily for them, they were too far out, and his arm strength isn’t quite there yet, so he didn’t come close to hitting them.

As we made our way slowly around the lake, stopping every few feet to throw another stick, we came upon a parking garage. Troy decided that all he wanted to do was climb the stairs to the top, so we did. And then we climbed down again. Troy decided that he hadn’t gotten enough of a leg workout, so we climbed the stairs to the top again. And then we climbed down again. This beautiful lake, and all my son wanted to do was climb the stairs of a parking garage. I finally got him moving again, but he was pretty tired at that point, so I picked him up and out him on my shoulders.

It was a cool, overcast day, which made it pleasant to be outside. What we didn’t plan on was the wind blowing the water into little waves cresting across the lake. At one point, it was blowing so hard, that it literally stopped me in my tracks. It was all I could do not to be pushed backwards. If Troy hadn’t been on my shoulders, I believe he would have been blown into the lake. The wind was picking the water up out of the lake and blowing it in a twisting wall down the sidewalk, covering us with water and scaring the bejesus out of Troy. He was screaming in terror, so I took him back to the car. He refused to get off my shoulders the entire time, even though the wind abated after we got behind the buildings again.

After we left the lake, the sun was close to setting. So, I found a field near a subdivision off the freeway that was covered in bluebonnets. I’d never taken a bluebonnet picture with Troy, and the light was perfect. He obliged, but the wind started picking up again, so we decided not to push our luck. It was a really cool adventure with my son.

Once Bitten, Twice Shy - Part 3

I was wrestling with Troy upstairs today.  After knocking me to the floor, he decided to add insult to injury and sat on my face.  I was immediately sent back to the trauma of my childhood.  I had a flashback of my brother sitting on my face and flatulating.  I could still feel my cheeks vibrating, as I struggled to breathe.  And here I was thirty-five years later being subjected to the same abuse, but this time by my three-year old son.  Let me tell you that it's not as easy as it seems to lift 40 lbs of dead weight off your face, but adrenaline kicked in as my panic grew, and I managed to get him off...only for him to sit on me again.  I did the only thing I knew at this point, the same thing I did to my brother so many year ago, and I bit Troy on the backside.  Unlike my brother who howled in pain and immediately disembarked from my head, Troy merely giggled.  I guess he couldn't really feel it through his thick, puffy diaper!

Lots of Egret Babies

I picked Troy up from daycare today, and he saw a white egret flying by the window of the car. It landed in a tree with dozens of other white egrets. They have a protected nesting ground on the university campus, and every year, they come back to this same spot to lay their eggs.

Troy said, “Look, dada! It’s a white egret! He’s going to the other white egrets. They’re making egret babies! Lots of egret babies.”

“That’s right, bud. Where did you learn that?”

“Mama told me.”

The kid is wise beyond his years. He knows things that he can’t even fully comprehend yet.

The Werewolf Foot

As Troy was having his breakfast this morning, I turned on a cartoon called “Cracke.” It follows a lone chicken that has a series of misadventures while trying to protect her eggs. Usually, something or somethings bad happen to her as she sacrifices herself, placing herself between her eggs and the dangers of living in the desert.

In the episode this morning, she lays down behind a rock to sleep. As she dozes off, the clouds part and a full moon is on display. It’s magical light touches her foot, the only part of her visible from behind the rock. Suddenly, her foot mutates and grows into a vicious monster foot. It opens its claws into a crude “mouth” and howls at the moon. It then starts to crawl towards the eggs.

At this point, the chicken wakes up, sees what the monster werewolf foot is doing, and rips it off. Tossing into a bunch of cacti, she huddles protectively around her eggs. What she doesn’t realize is that there is an unsuspecting rhinoceros in the cacti that promptly gets eaten by the foot. The next morning the chicken finds the engorged foot lying next to a rhinoceros horn.

Troy fell asleep during the car ride in this morning. This is very unusual, so I assumed he must be really tired. I kept the car quiet and let him sleep as long as I could. But I had to wake him when we got to the daycare. He awoke with a start and blurted out, “The chicken foot turned into a werewolf, dada, and it ate a rhinoceros!”

I couldn’t help it, I just started laughing. I said, “Yes, it did.”

He started laughing too, and he said, “That’s very funny!”

Triangle Fish

Tonight, I decided to try something different for dinner.  I didn't really feel like trying to cook something and there weren't any leftovers in the fridge (amazingly enough), so I asked Troy if he wanted to go on an adventure.  Always up for an adventure, he eagerly agreed.  Then, he asked, "Where are we going, dada?"  I told him that I was going to take him somewhere new to get food tonight.  To which he replied, "Good, because my stomach's rumbling.  I'm very hungry."

We drove to Denton, and I introduced Troy to triangle fish, which is code for Long John Silver's!  (My old friend BD used to call the fish that, although not technically accurate, as the fish are in the shape of a rhombus, not a triangle.)  Troy also had his first hushpuppy (which he didn't like) and fish crunchies, which is an LJS specialty (which he loved).  He enjoyed the fish too, but only after I peeled the crunchy outer layer off and exposed the fish inside.  For some reason, he liked eating the fish and the crunchy outer layer, but not together.

In the Company of Babes

Today, my boss asked his direct reports if they’d like to do a team dinner next week. I gave it the appropriate consideration, and after that one second was up, I responded in the negative. A lunch would be one thing, but a dinner means time away from my family. And to be perfectly honest, I prefer the company of a three-year old to all of theirs combined.

The Rubber Chicken

I had to go into the office yesterday for the first time in over two years. My boss wanted me to clean up the desks of people who no longer work there and generally make sure everything is in order for the official reopening of the office in a month.

In one of the desks, I found a green rubber chicken. It had been a short-lived promotional awards program that I’d started a few weeks before the pandemic started. I handed them out to a few key members of the team to try to stir up a little friendly team competition.

I guess this person hadn’t found it to be the treasure I had intended. So, I took it home to give to Troy. He loved it. But after 27 seconds of hearing that thing croak and squawk, I immediately regretted that decision. Thankfully, his short attention span kicked in, and I only had to hear it for a little while before he was off onto something else.

But this morning, he found it lying on the floor where he’d left it, and I was serenaded to the sounds of croaking and squawking. Troy took the chicken in the car with him, and held it while he sang in a rather croaky voice. The song was very long and elaborate, going through quite a few emotional changes before coming to an abrupt end with one long note. Then, Troy gave the chicken one long squeeze, and it croaked out a long slow note that sounded exactly like the end of Troy’s song. I busted out laughing.

Leaving You

My wife had to fly out to St. Louis this morning for a job interview.  She is being courted by Washington University, and they wanted her to come meet the other professors and give a presentation of her work.  She's been preparing for (or more accurately stressing and agonizing over) it for weeks now, but today was finally the day for her to go there and wow them.

We had to get Troy up super early, but as usual he surprised me.  I started waking him up 30 minutes early, because it usually takes a half hour of me cajoling him before he'll reluctantly get out of bed.  This morning, I started the process and then went downstairs to get some breakfast.  Within two minutes, I heard his little feet pattering across the kitchen tiles, and I looked over to see him walking towards me with his hair sticking out in every direction and his eyes half closed.  He looked like one of those commercials for a coffee company...pre-caffeine.  I changed his diaper and clothes and settled him on the couch with some chocolate milk and cartoons to wake up.

It still never ceases to amaze me at how perceptive Troy is.  I had told him yesterday that we'd have to take his mama to the airport today and that she'd have to be away for a few days, but I wasn't really sure that he understood what that meant.  But in the car ride to the airport, he put his little hand on top of hers, and he said, "I don't want to take you to the airport, mama.  I don't want you to go.  Let's do it later."

Tearing up, she said, "Unfortunately, it has to be today, baby.  Mama has to go, but I don't want to leave you."

Troy thought about this for a few seconds and then replied, "Well, I don't want to leave you at the airport.  I'm very sad, mama."

I'm not going to lie, I was crying by this point too.

To Pee or Not to Pee...That is the Question

Tonight, Troy found my wife in the bathroom, and he asked to sit on the potty. They had been encouraging him to sit on the potty at daycare throughout the day, which coupled with peer pressure, he has been more willing to do. But up to this point, he would only sit there for a minute and then want to get up again. But he had never asked to do it at home.

So my wife immediately helped him get his pants down, take off his diaper, and navigate onto the toilet. After a few seconds, he peed for the first time! He was so proud of himself. We were immensely proud too. We cheered and gave him high fives…then we all promptly washed our hands.

Conveyor Belt Life

Sometimes I feel like Troy lives a conveyor belt life. He gets moved from one station to the next, while we do something to him. To the table to eat. To the bathroom for a bath. To the changing table for drying and new clothes. To the sink for teeth brushing. To the bedroom for his eye medicine. To his room for bedtime. It’s like an opening scene of a Jetsons’ episode.

Spray-On Tan

Troy had spaghetti for dinner tonight, and he ended up getting sauce everywhere. He had it all over his face, in his hair, up and down his arms, and on his neck. He was orange all over. By the time he got done, he looked like he had a bad spray-on tan.

Three-Year Checkup

Troy had his three-year old doctor's checkup today.  He was much more chilled and relaxed this time in the doctor's office.  He didn't scream or cry at being poked or prodded.  In fact, he willingly complied with everything the doctor asked him to do; like climbing up onto the exam table, taking off his socks, opening up his mouth, and saying "Aaaaahhh!"  Part of that might have had to do with the fact that he wasn't getting any shots this time, but generally I think Troy is more aware and understanding of the world around him.  He's willing to participate in what you ask of him, as long as you ask him nicely, you don't interfere with his play time, and he doesn't have something better going on at the time.

Overall, he got a clean bill of health.  Although plateaued a little, he's still in the 99th percentile for height, coming in at 41.75" tall.  He weighed in at 39 lbs, despite hardly ever eating, which is still good for 95th percentile.  And after finding out from some of the other parents in his class that their kids are sub-30 lbs, I think he's still doing fine.  The only "issue" noted was that he might have an over-active colon that tries to suck too much water out of his stool.  Not a life-threatening issue, but it could account for why his poops are sometimes harder and more difficult to get out.

Since he was such an amazing boy at the doctor, we took him to get some ice cream at Marble Slab as a treat.  We let him pick his flavor and toppings, and Troy decided on chocolate ice cream and sprinkles.  A little tame for my liking, but he would not be persuaded to get anything else.  I can respect a man that knows what he wants!