Mr. Butler

Troy: “Dada, I really wish I had a robot butler.”
Me: “Why do you think you should get a butler?! I don’t have a butler! In fact, not only does nobody do anything for me, but I do everything for everybody else. Actually, now that I think about it, I am YOUR butler! I feed you, clean you, help you get dressed, and serve you in every possible way! The only real complaint you could have is that I don’t call you ‘sir.’ Although, I think the proper term for someone your age is actually ‘master.’”
Troy [giggling]: “Don’t forget that you also wipe my bum!”
Me: “Not one of the more glamorous parts of my job.”

Flag Football: Linebacker

Despite Troy’s initial lack of interest in flag football, he has actually done really well with it, especially on defense. He has almost all of the traits that I would wish for in a middle linebacker, if I was building one in Madden. He has fantastic awareness of the field, great acceleration and speed, awesome pursuit and instincts, amazing leadership and focus, and dogged determination. He may not always catch the kids on the other team, but he doesn’t give up.

Unfortunately, he comprises the entire defense on his team. All of the rest of the kids usually just stand around and watch the play unfold around them. Or they get in Troy’s way and trip him up. For the last two weeks, he’s comprised of 100% of the flags ripped off the opposing team. (Unless you count the kid on his team that rips the flags off his own teammates.) He’s so good, that he actually won a weekly award for Defensive MVP.

Offense is a completely different story. Usually, the coach puts him at quarterback, because he’s the only one discipline enough to take the ball from center and hand it to the running back. But he finds very little interest in this, because he really wants to run the ball. Of course, ALL of the kids really want to run the ball, and someone has to be quarterback. At least he’s not the center!

The problem with him running the ball is that he’s afraid of losing his flags, so he runs to the sidelines instead of the end zone. So, the coach doesn’t let him run it very often, especially when he has a really fast kid that’s good at avoiding the opposing team’s defense. Oh well, I love that he’s so good at defense, and he’s had a lot of practice at it, chasing me around the upstairs of our house!

Sockie vs. Lippie

So, Troy and I were riding in the car today, and he had this conversation between his toys:

Panther Toy: “Let’s go, Sockie.”
Sockie: “Okay, but my name is Lippie.”
Panther Toy: “No, your name is Sockie, because you’re a sock.”
Sockie: “Got it. My name is Lippie.”
Panther Toy: “That’s not what I said at all! Sockie, not Lippie!”
Sockie: “We’re saying the same thing.”
Panther Toy: “No, we’re not.”
Sockie: “You said Lippie, and so did I.”
Panther Toy: “No, I didn’t. I said Sockie! There are no lips!”
Sockie: “Maybe if you whispered it to me.”
Panther Toy [whispering in Sockie’s ear]: “Sockie.”
Sockie [whispering back]: “Lippie.”
Panther Toy [whispering in Sockie’s ear]: “Sockie.”
Sockie [whispering back]: “Lippie.”
Panther Toy: “Oh my gosh, are you doing this on purpose?!”
Sockie: “Doing what? I just repeated what you said to me.”
Panther Toy: “SOOOOOCCCCCKKKKKIIIIEEEE!!!”
Sockie: “Yeah, Sockie, that’s what I said too.”
Panther Toy: “Are you kidding me right now?! I’m going to rip that sock off your hand! Come here!”

Is God Real?

We were riding in the car, and this conversation happened between Troy and his friend Sasha, who is being raised in a Muslim household. I am envious and proud at easily my son shares his faith with others. He has no worldly inhibitions making him feel scared or ashamed. He just speaks his heart. And it’s amazing to me at how many adults feel awkward when he’s sharing or praying. Like it’s taboo, but like they also feel uncomfortable trying to stop him. He is a powerful weapon for the Lord!

Sasha: “I swallowed a hair band once. And my grandmother told me not to worry, because God would get it out. And when I woke up the next day, my hair band came out!”
Troy: “Wow!”
Sasha: “Is God real?”
Troy: “Yes.”
Sasha: “Really? Is He a ghost?”
Troy: “No.”
Sasha: “Is He an angel?”
Troy: “No, the angels work for Him.”
Sasha: “So, He’s the king.”
Troy: “Jesus is the king.”
Sasha: “I thought Jesus was God’s son.”
Troy: “He is.”
Sasha: “So, then Jesus would be the prince.”
Troy: “No, He’s the king.”
Sasha: “But if He’s the son, then He’d be the prince, not the king. God would be the king.”
Troy: “You can have more than one king. We talk about Jesus all the time at my school.”
Sasha: “Your teacher shouldn’t be doing that. She could get in trouble for that.”
Troy: “No, it’s okay, because it’s a Christian school. We’re supposed to talk about Jesus.”
Sasha: “Well, my teacher, Mrs. Martinez, told me about Jesus one day, and I told my mom. My mom got very upset and said she was going to talk to the principal. She said my teacher shouldn’t be talking to me about that stuff. And my brother told me that it was illegal for my teacher to talk to me about that at school.”
Troy: “Well, it’s okay at my school.”
Sasha: “How?”
Me: “You are both correct. You go to different kinds of schools. Sasha, at your school, they aren’t supposed to talk about God or Jesus. But they can at Troy’s school, because it’s a special school just for that.”
Sasha: “Oh.”

Bandit Blue Heeler

Me: “Troy is really into Bluey now. Have you heard of that show?”
Charlotte’s Dad: “Oh yeah, I’m intimately familiar with Bluey. Bandit Blue Heeler has made all of the rest of us look like terrible fathers. He’s set the bar too high.”
Me: “Absolutely! Troy watches an episode and then wants me to reenact whatever he sees. And he’s always disappointed when i don’t do it correctly!”
Charlotte’s Dad: “Yeah, it’s impossible to live up to his standards.”
Me: “Seriously, and who has the time for that?! I’m guessing he’s just a stay-at-home dad, since he’s always with the kids.”
Charlotte’s Dad: “Oh no, he’s an accountant for the government or something. I think his wife works too.”
Me: “That makes me feel worse!”
Charlotte’s Dad: “I know.”

The Snowcano

There was still some leftover snow on the ground today, so Troy and I decided to go outside and play in it again before it melted. At first, we attempted to scrape together enough snow to build a snowman, but somewhere along the way, it morphed into a snow mountain instead. So, I got the bright idea to hollow it out and make it a snowcano. When we were done, we had a three-foot high mini volcano.

But Troy wasn’t satisfied with merely building it, he wanted to knock it down as well. So, he got a running start, took off at full speed, slammed into the side of the snowcano, bounced off, and sat there stunned. He didn’t even make a dent in it. After several attempts to no avail, I decided to give it a go as well. Unfortunately, I miscalculated both the resiliency of the structure and the force my extra body weight would generate. The snowcano gave easily under my onslaught, and I went flying feet over head off the top of it, and I face planted into the ground…just as my wife took a picture to preserve that moment for all eternity.

Snowball Fiiiiigggghhhhhtttt!

We had a freak snowstorm blow through Dallas today. Everything was closed down, so we just hunkered down in the house to wait it out. At some point in the afternoon, the temptation to go out in the whiteness was too great, and we all went out to catch snowflakes on our tongues, build a tiny snowman, and have a no-holds-barred snowball war! Troy attempted the "hit and run" technique, where he would whack me with a snowball as he ran by and then attempt to get far enough away before my snowball whacked him in the back.  My wife attempted the "duck and cover" technique, where she would hide behind the playset and throw snowballs from behind a barricade. But none of those mattered in the end, because there are no rules in a snowball war, and I'm an excellent battlefield strategist.

When Troy would attempt to hit me, I sidestepped his throw and fired at his retreating back, leading him, so I could hit him on the run. I lobbed snowballs up and over my wife's barricade, dropping clumps of snow down on her head. It was raining death from above! I also stockpiled snowballs, so I could rapid fire on them when they attempted to "bum rush" me. But the most epic of my offenses was my giant soccer ball-sized snowball that would hit and explode to cover someone's entire head and torso! Let's just say that you think twice about getting close to me when that bad boy's coming for you.

It was a lot of fun to get out of the house, have some fun, and get some exercise. Unfortunately, our little snowman didn't make it. Not because he melted, but because at some point, he was used as ammo in the snowball fight.

The Grand Adventure: Homeward Bound

Onward to home today…unfortunately. Overall, it was a really nice trip, but it was a lot of driving. I honestly think we spent exactly the right amount of time in each location, and we saw a lot of really cool places. It just would have been nice to teleport to each one instead. While we enjoyed the places we went, I’m not sure we’d go to see them again. I think it was a once in a lifetime kind of thing. I think our next adventure will have a little less flatness, desolation, desert, and rock formations. And now…laundry.

The Grand Adventure: Palo Duro Canyon

We visited Palo Duro Canyon State Park today, which is the second largest canyon in the United States. This park is a little different from the Grand Canyon in that it’s geared toward hiking, not driving. Also, instead of hiking down into the canyon, you drive down into the canyon and hike back to the top. The goal was to try to do some hiking and give Troy an opportunity to finally get out of the car and get out some energy.

My wife felt like death warmed over this morning, but she decided to come with us anyway. She said she would rather feel like crap and rest in a beautiful place than to do it in the hotel. It worked out I suppose, because Troy and I would set out on a trail, and then my wife would drive the car around to the other end and sleep while she waited for us to get there.

I wasn’t sure how Troy would do with the hiking, and I wasn’t sure how hard the trails were going to be, so I picked the shortest, easiest trail to do first. We took the Pioneer Nature Trail, which was described as a 0.4 mile hike down to the river and back. It was supposed to take about a half an hour and was the only trail that looped back to the beginning. The “river” was really just a small creek and barely had any water in it. It also only took us about 15 minutes to complete the hike, and Troy and I were surprised when it was over. I guess so was my wife because she wasn’t there when we got back. Apparently, she had driven off to find a bathroom, and we were stranded.

So, we decided to try the Kiowa Trail, which started from the same location as the Pioneer Nature Trail. It was a 1.4 mile one-way hike and was supposed to take 1.5 hours. I texted my wife and asked her to meet us at the other end. The trail started out meandering through the grasslands and scrub trees along the Red River. There were views of Triassic Peak, looming off in the distance as we walked. Troy and I were having fun chatting with each other about the sites around us, and Troy was making up stories to share with me about an alien following us down the trail. I shared memories and funny stories with him of previous hikes when I was a kid. It was good to hear his laughter echoing through the trees.

As we neared the end of the trail, we came upon a large red cliff with white slashes across its surface. Some of the slashes were nothing more than a thin line, but some were as thick as my arm. Most of them cut through the red rock in parallel layers, but a few spider-webbed at angles between layers. The contrast was really very striking. As we got closer, we realized that the white slashes were actually veins of some mineral throughout the red cliffs. We found out later that it was satin spar gypsum, which is a soft fibrous mineral commonly found in sedimentary rocks, which explained its presence in layers in the red cliffs. Troy and I spent a good deal of time examining the formations, marveling at their beauty, and climbing up into little pockets that had been washed away into caves. We were so enthralled by the cliffs that we hiked to the end and brought my wife back to see them too.

After a quick bathroom break, lunch, and an encounter with a road runner, Troy and I decided to hike the Sunflower Trail. This trail was 1.2 miles and again was supposed to take 1.5 hours to complete. It started out snaking through scrub trees, rocks, and prickly pear cacti. We had awesome views of the towering canyon walls above us as we descended into the grasslands. The grasslands were tall stalks of thick grasses taller than me! It was almost like passing through a cornfield. The trail was shady with lots of large trees hanging over the path and ultimately ended up by the Red River again. This portion of the river was a little larger with more water and even had a few small waterfalls cutting across the twisting river. We took some time to just stop and listen to the soothing sound of the water. Troy and I found a lot of deer footprints near the water, so I guess it’s a popular spot for wildlife to come get a drink. Near the end of this trail, we once again encountered large red cliffs with white gypsum slashing through them.

Our last stop was a quick hike from the Soapberry Day-Use Area to see the Cowboy Cutout, which was a little shack cut into the side of a hill. From the top, you’d never even know that it was there. It just looked liked a hill. But inside it was a spacious one-room shack with a fireplace at one end. Troy wanted to know why they didn’t have any furniture, and I told him that it had been removed, but that they probably had a table and chairs and most likely some beds off to the side. What was most noticeable to him was how dark it was inside with no windows or electricity. The only light was shafts pouring through the holes in the dirt. It was a stark reminder of how many luxuries that we have today that people didn’t enjoy back in the 1800s.

The Grand Adventure: Wind Farms

Today was just a travel day, going from Albuquerque to Amarillo. There was an audible elation of joy from the backseat when we crossed the border and were back in Texas. I guess Troy is really ready to be home. My wife has now decided that she’s sick too, so I guess she’s ready to be home in her own bed. I’m feeling marginally better than I did in the Grand Canyon. Figures that I’d be on the mend as we near home.

Anyway, the coolest part of the journey today was seeing the giant wind turbine farms after we crossed into Texas. There’s something both awe-inspiring at seeing the technological advancements of man and peaceful at seeing those giant propellers moving gracefully around in circles. I rode along just watching them move slowly and effortlessly as the sun set behind them…their giant silhouettes black against the yellow-tinted sky. It’s amazing how large those things are. I mean you don’t really get a true sense of their enormity until you see them up close. It’s a wonder to behold.

The Grand Adventure: Meteor Crater

It feels weird to write the date as 2025. It didn’t even feel like the passing of a year last night. There were no fireworks, no celebrations, no marking of an ending or beginning…no indication that it wasn’t a day like any other.

We are finally on our way home. Despite being sick, I still don’t want our adventure to end. Although, I seem to be alone in that category. Troy has been asking incessantly when we’ll be home. I’m not really sure what he’s homesick for. If it’s just the familiarity of his stuff around him, or if it’s for the monotonous routine that our life has become. It was inevitable that we’d be driving back to that life, but I don’t need the constant reminder that it’s coming soon. Troy keeps saying that he enjoyed Roswell the most of all the things we saw on this trip. I’m not sure if that’s because of the alien angle or because it was the closest place to our house.

We are headed to Albuquerque today, but I decided to throw in another unplanned activity on our way. So, we stopped at Meteor Crater just outside of Flagstaff. From a distance, the rising rim of rock debris looks like another distant mountain on the relatively flat horizon. But once you get to the top of the rim, the crater is immense, measuring one mile across and three miles around.

Meteor Crater is the site of the most perfectly intact impact crater in the world. It’s not the largest, but the others are under the water or covered in forests. Being in such an arid landscape has kept the site visible and clear. We took the guided tour, which takes you only about a quarter of a mile around the top, but it was filled with a lot of good information and history about the site. For example, the meteor that hit was estimated to be traveling about 26,000 miles per hour and hit with a force of a 20 megaton bomb. It left a crater approximately 700 feet deep. The impact was so hard that it actually lifted three layers of the earth into the air, flipped them over, and dropped them back down again. This process is called reverse stratigraphy. The meteor most likely exploded apart on impact, raining debris in a radius of some 15 miles away. The meteor was made up of 92% iron and nickel, which made it extremely heavy. They found one fragment a couple of miles away that weighed over 1400 lbs! Due to its chemical composition, the high metal content also makes the meteor crater site act like a giant lightning rod, attracting lightning strikes in droves during the storm season.

Troy didn’t truly appreciate the significance or wonder of the crater. All he wanted to know was what happened to the meteor. So, after a couple of hours, we headed on our way. We encountered some sweet rock formations and a beautiful sunset before we arrived at the hotel. We’re staying at a Home2 Suites, and it’s amazing! It’s by far the nicest hotel we’ve stayed in so far. It’s practically brand new, and everything is modern and updated. The room is huge, and we have a full kitchen and full-sized couch. I wish we’d had this place in the Grand Canyon. Oh, and they also had chocolate chip cookies when we came in.