Longing

Lord, we want children.  You know this already.  But we are broken.  I don't know why we were both made with issues.  I don't understand filling two people with such beautiful hearts, bursting with love to give away, and then denying them the opportunity.  I don't understand telling me that I'm going to be a father, but then showing no obvious path to get there.  I also don't know what You want me to do.

I desire my wife all the time, but she doesn't seem to desire me back.  She is supposed to lose weight, but it's extremely difficult for her.  It all seems to fall on her.  So, other than praying, I don't know what to do.  I have faith in You and Your ability to make a miracle happen, but the longer this goes on the harder it is to hold onto.  I struggle with putting our faith in science, because I feel like it's trying to take it out of Your hands.  I know You can do this, but I don't see You doing it.  Nothing seems to be working toward that end, and time just ticks by.

My prayer is for You to give my wife strength to stick with the diet and motivation to add exercise too.  Give her peace and patience to wait for Your timing, and give her faith to let go of the need to control and just believe.  Renew my faith and bring me those to lift my arms, because I'm tired and weary.  Help us know what path You have for us, because there are so many options and unknowns.  And even if it's not Your way, please make us more intimate because I think it will make us closer and more of a family.

"Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows."  James 1:17 NIV