In the Minds of Babes

My little sleeping baby. What are you thinking about? What are you dreaming about? What do you see as you look around the room? What’s going through your mind as you dream? Are you thinking about me and your mommy? Are you reliving the horrors and trauma of your first couple of days? Are you just taking in all of the new sensations? Are you dreaming about milk? Is that why you’re smiling?

I want you to know every day how much I love you. I’m not the kind of daddy who will hide it. I will hug you and kiss you, and I’ll tell you I love you. I’ll cry when you hurt, and I’ll gush with pride when you accomplish everything. I never want you to wonder. You’re awesome and amazing. You’re everything I wanted and more. I’m so incredibly lucky. I don’t want to go to work and miss out on a single thing that you do. I want to take in every look, and sound, and gesture. I want to be there for all of your firsts. But I can’t. I have to work to provide for you and take care of you. I want you to have the best, and that means I have to miss some things to give them to you. I’m so sorry for that. I would be there every second if I could. I miss you already. You will never fathom the depth of my love for you. My heart is so full that it runneth over. I’m crying as I write this, because I feel so much for you, my beautiful little baby boy. And I can’t stop. You’re everything to me, and everything I do is for you. I will protect you and fight for you. You’re my family now, and that’s forever.