I'm Melllltttttiiiinnnng!

Troy: “Dada, I’m thirsty.”
Me: “Well, why didn’t you say something before we left the house?”
Troy: “I didn’t know I was thirsty then.”
Me: “Okay, we’ll go back home to get you a drink. It’s raining, so I’m just going to stop in front of the house, and you can run in and grab a juice pouch, okay?”
Troy: “No, you want me to die, don’t you!”
Me: “Of course not! Why would you say that?”
Troy: “Because you’re going to make me run through the rain.”
Me: “You’re going to die from getting wet? What are you, the wicked witch of the west?!”
Troy: “No, but I could be struck by lightning, and then I’ll die.”
Me: “Yeah, if you got struck by lightning, you’d probably die. You’re pretty little.”
Troy: “And a tornado could come and blow me away.”
Me: “Wow! This has gotten so dramatic. Next, you’ll tell me that a snake could bite you on the way up the driveway and poison you.”
Troy: “No, but I could be attacked by a cat.”
Me: “Oh, well, I had no idea it was such a perilous journey to get juice. In that case, I guess I’ll have to pull into the garage.”
Troy: “Thank you.”