Baby Translator

I feel like someone should write and app that listens to what a baby says and translates it into actual words. I’m not sure how the underlying code would know what a baby was saying, but then since nobody could prove it was wrong, it could technically say anything! I’m already doing this when I have a conversation with my son. He says something, and I respond like I understood him. To which he says something else. And back and forth it goes. So why not have an app that can help everyone to have that joy...even those with less vivid imaginations.

Baby: "Da da da da da ga ga glurp."
Translator: "DaDa, I take exception to you kissing me in public. If it happens again, I will be hiring someone to teach you a lesson."
Baby: "Da ga ga da da aaaahhhhh spft."
Translator: "Don't think that just because I'm a baby that I'm helpless. I know people. You make connections on the inside...of the daycare."
Baby: "Ga aaaahhhhh aaaahhhhh uuuuuuuhhhhh mmm mmm."
Translator: "In addition to the kissing thing, I have a list of demands that must be met, or I'm going to find another family."
Baby: "Mmm mmm mmm uuhh oohh da daaaaaaaaahhh uh uh uh mmm mmm eeeehhhhh aaahhhhh uh uh ah haaaay. Phfft."
Translator: "Moo juice will be delivered at the correct temperature and at the precise time specified in the handbook. Late moo juice will not be tolerated. Hugs and kisses will be accepted by mommy only, and sometimes grammy. There will be no more comments about my chubby thighs. I will henceforth be referred to as 'Your Highness' and addressed with the reverence that goes with it. Noncompliance will be met with raspberries and random explosive diapers."