Orange Stripes

Well, Troy got his third stripe tonight, which cleared him for testing for his yellow belt next week. I was ecstatic, because as of last week, he didn’t even know his form. Much to his frustration, we worked on it all weekend, and he was nailing it this week. His instructor even told him that his form was the best in the class. I’m so proud of him. He can be really good at this when he focuses and puts in the work.

The Sorting Hat

The lawn people that our neighborhood has hired to mow our front yards do an absolutely terrible job at it. So, I opt to mow my own yard instead. To indicate to the mowing crews to skip my yard, they put an orange traffic cone on the sidewalk in front of my house. When I got back from dropping Troy off at his camp this morning, I saw the usual cone gracing our sidewalk. Only this cone looked like it had seen better days. It was partially crushed, and the top of it was bent over and torn. It looked just like the sorting hat from Harry Potter. I honestly wasn’t sure if they were saying not to mow our yard, or if we’re being sorted into a house at Hogwarts!

I Will Break You!

Troy: “Dada?”
Me: “Troy.”
Troy: “What’s your favorite type of egg?”
Me: “Probably scrambled, but I also like over easy and sunny side up.”
Troy: “I like scrambled too. I don’t like boiled eggs.”
Me: “Boiled eggs aren’t my favorite, but I can choke them down. Why don’t you like them? Is it the taste? Or the consistency?”
Troy: “Both. I don’t like the taste of the white part.”
Me: “What?! The white part of an egg has no taste!”
Troy: “Well, I can taste it. I have strong taste buds.”
Me: “What are you saying?! My taste buds are weak?!”
Troy [laughing]: “Yes!”
Me [in an Austrian accent]: “Dada, your taste buds are weak! They are no match for my muscley taste buds! We are here to show you real taste buds. Not that weak crap that you have! My taste buds will break your weak little taste buds.”
Troy [still laughing]: “Exactly!”

Disney Trivial Pursuit

Troy: “I really hope you get this question wrong, dada.”
Me: “That’s not very nice.”
Troy: “Well, you’ve answered like seven questions in a row! I think it’s time to move on to someone else.”
Me: “You mean move on to you, since it’s your turn next?”
Troy: “Well, yeah.”
Gammy: “How many daughters did King Neptune have?”
Me: “Seven. One for each of the seas.”
Gammy: “Correct.”
Troy: “Argh!”
Me: “Sorry, Troy, but I’m not done yet. I’m now one pie piece behind you.”
Troy: “This is where it starts to get hard. Let’s see what you’re made of!”

…two questions later…

Gammy: “What does Shang put at the top of a pole…?”
Me: “An arrow!”
Gammy: “You didn’t even let me finish, but that’s correct.”
Me: “That’s what I’m made of, Troy. And now we have the same number of pieces.”

…I missed the next question, and it was Troy’s turn…

Me: “What was the name of the Sea Witch in The Little Mermaid?”
Troy: “Uh…I know her, but I forget her name.”
Me: “Well, that’s the question. What’s her name?”
Troy: “That’s not fair! I know who you’re talking about. That should be enough!”
Me: “Sorry, that’s not how the game works. You have to answer the question correctly.”
Gammy: “Maybe if you tell him what letter it starts with…”
Me: “U.”
Troy: “Oh, Ursula!”
Me [fake complaining]: “Argh! When will someone else get a turn?! Stop answering everything correctly!”
Troy [smiling smugly]: “Sorry, dada. I can’t help it that I’m so good at this game!”
Me: “Yeah, you’re doing great, bud.”