Ghost Pirates

Me: “Why is that stick thing playing music?”
Troy: “That’s what it does. It plays a pirate song.”
Me: “But it’s playing on its own. Nobody is touching it. It’s like a ghost is playing with it. Why is it doing that?”
Troy: “I don’t know. Go check it out.”
Me: “I don’t want to go over there. It’s dark over there. You go.”
Troy: “I don’t want to go over there either. Besides, I’m busy.”
Me [crawling across the floor]: “Fine, but I’m staying low in case a ghost flies by.”
Troy [running across the room after me]: “Dada, I need to touch it! I want to push the button!”
Me [snatching it away just before he can grab it]: “No, you don’t! You don’t need to touch it! Don’t push the button. It’s being quiet now, just leave it alone.”
Troy [lunging for it]: “No! I need to push it!”
Me: “No, you don’t! Control yourself! You’re acting like a mad man!”

…several minutes go by of Troy and I wrestling over the pirate stick…

Troy: “Hmmm, I have an idea.”
Me: “No, you don’t! Stop having ideas!”
Troy: “I’ll never stop having ideas! Give me that stick!”
Me: “Never! I’ll never let you push the button!”
Troy: “But I need to push it!”
Me: “No, you don’t!”
Troy: “Wait. I have another idea.”
Me: “No, you don’t! I told you to stop having ideas!”
Troy: “I will never stop having ideas! Never!”